Alright…Zumba is fun.

  
I am a person who avoids instant success fads.  Well I guess I should say I resist them.  Overnight best selling novel?  Nope I refuse to buy or read it until it has had it’s run and I find it in the bargain bin at the bookstore.  Then chances are pretty good that I will be up all night reading it unable to put it down.  Huh, who knew a billion other people could be right?

So Zumba hits my neck of the woods a few years ago, and suddenly everyone is doing Zumba.  I see Zumba work out DVDs, instruction manuals, classes, Zumba fusion classes, fashion apparel, Zumba soundtracks…well you get it.  Me? I stubbornly avoid it!  Have nothing to do with it, change the subject if it is brought up.  Why? I like to Dance, I stay active and like to be fit, I even enjoy that Spanish music.  No it’s just too ‘IN’.  I won’t let them get me! I am no sheep!  Nuts to you Zumba brainwashers!

So I have been bumping up my training this fall now that my calf is healed up and I had such a poor training summer because of that injury.  Well… I tried Zumba.  It was great!  I can’t remember having so much fun while working out! I do bootcamp every Thursday and have for the past 3 years.  I enjoy it,  I feel like a warrior at the end of every session, and I spend the entire session silently cursing my instructor and imagining the horrible ways I can exact my revenge, but I enjoy the benefits.  Zumba, I get to Dance around to fun music, work every part of my body and despite the fact that I am dripping with sweat by the end of class, I am completely surprised that the hour had passed so quickly! I was instantly hooked.  Now it is my Monday Activity.  I wake up a little happier it is Zumba day!  I really can’t believe I resisted for so long. 

Do you think this had cured my of my stubborn avoidance of instant fads?  Sigh…I doubt it.  

But now I will always have Zumba.

Gonna be a looong weekend

  
I need to learn to say no.  I went from a nice relaxed weekend with only one 7 hr shift and spending my downtime cuddling some pups while I dog sat for a friend.  Now due to an emergency at work and my ‘expertise’ in this specific area they need me to work, I have even been redistributed from my previously scheduled shift.  So my weekend now had a fully slated work schedule totalling 22hrs, a creatively constructed bathroom/walk plan for the pups before work and during negotiated breaks, and one tired girl.

I am a workaholic, previously as necessity, currently more of a habit.  But I have been slowing down and enjoying my downtime.  My one biggest problem?  I just can’t say no.  I am not sure if it is the field I work in which is in a caregiving role.  If the shift isn’t filled care is compromised and people are effected.  Or just my subconscious need to please.  I don’t exactly no which it is or if it is a mixture of both, but when I was called in for the initial emergency last night and my new weekend schedule began to unfold before me saying ‘no’ didn’t cross my mind much less my lips.  I nodded and helped them tweak and adjust, discussed and outlined biggest challenges and observation strategies, all the while my mind was clicking away outlining my own personal obligations and adjusting schedules ect.  It wasn’t until I got home and slumped all exhausted like on the couch that I realized I had no real obligation and could have said ‘no’. I could have kept my lazy weekend.  Had a sleep in this morning, enjoyed a leisurely pot of coffee (that was not a typo) and just enjoyed the stillness.  Oh well,  I still have the coffee, and as long as that keeps coming all will be well.

Playtime for Daddy

Playtime for Daddy

  

Daddy and I have not had a chance to see each other for a loooooooonnnnnnggggg stretch this time. We just seem to have conflicting schedules. So to tide this greedy little one over, Daddy gave me a few tasks to accomplish. I got an immediate thrill in my belly when I got the email outlining Daddy’s instructions for me. He hit all the buttons. I was thrilled, a little apprehensive, full of blushes and undeniably aroused. Then I got sick (super pouty and angry face inserted here). My tasks got shelved for a bit. But I am pretty much back toy old self.

So my first task was a couple of videos for Daddy. I had to do two. One was just for Daddy (phew)…the other was for my xhamster account (gulp). I have long since admitted to myself that I do have a bit of an exhibitionist in me, so I get that thrill but at the same time opening myself to public opinion is always a little nerve racking.  

Daddy’s video had a little bit of everything. He wanted me to film my little time one evening. This has become quite natural for me now, even if it is only for that 15 mins some days, my little comes out quite easily now and I have embraced her whims so there was little challenge here except for remembering to speak up a bit. Then Daddy wanted to see me in corner time, which I was a little pouty about, cause I have been a good girl! After corner time Daddy wanted me to play like a big girl. It was mostly fun doing the private clip for Daddy, it was something just the two of us shared and I felt a connection with Daddy despite the fact we are so far away.  

The next clip was another grown up play session. I was to strip down and describe my body both through my eyes and Daddy’s eyes why Daddy liked that part of me and how Daddy liked me to present it. Then I had to bring out my toys. Then with my nipples clipped, my bottom plugged and my kitty teased with various items I had to play and cum for the camera 3 times. I was of course allowed to keep my face out of the shot, but I still felt so exposed. It was a little off putting talking about my body as well because I still have some body issues, so highlight and exposing myself bit by bit was a little discomforting. By the time I got to my play though I was wet and sooo close to the edge. My cummies came fast and hard, so my body obviously was more into it the my conscious mind.

Then my final task was I was to start really looking around on fetlife. Check out some of the discussion groups that focus on our tastes, see who was out there, what was going on. Daddy wants me to start playing with the idea of having some little friends. This is kinda scary, I am fairly shy initially. I get the benefits, having friends who have the same interests can be a good support system and can expand the dynamic, also people who are in the dynamic don’t require as much of a filter. I don’t share this side of myself with ‘muggles’ as Daddy would put it. Daddy said I just had to look right now, see what was around and see if anything or anyone popped out at me in the interest. There are a few groups in my general area but they aren’t overly active, so that was the first hurdle. I kinda felt alone. I have gotten more adept at navigating the sight, and have come across some interesting things in the searches. Daddy wants me to look for 1/2 hr a day for a week. I am to email him what I found, how it made me feel and send him links to the pages that interest me.

So I am still researching my naughty interests and searching for some local littles, though I do appreciate the connections I have made here on wordpress.  But my video assignment is done. Below is a link Daddy.

Task #2

Walking Dead

Ugh. This last 10 days have been the hardest I can remember in sometime.  I got the full gambit of symptoms from nausea to fever to achy joints to sore throat.  The list goes on, but I am probably whiney and boring enough already.  I first thought food poisoning, then as my symptoms accumulated I thought flu.  It was suggested that it could have been West Nile fever.  I soon stopped caring about the what I just wanted it over.  I don’t get sick often, when I do get sick I usually get over the worst if it within 24 hrs and even then I am one grumpy gal’.  After day 3 I was fully entrenched in self pity and misery.  I was basically thinking

  
Of course, I wasn’t dying.  But I briefly thought that might be the better alternative. On top of the general ickiness of being sick was I lost pretty much all motivation which had me upset with myself. I even had a blushy and tingly assignment from Daddy, that was shelved for a handful of days and those always gain my immediate attention.  He’s been very understanding when I explained the reason for the delay, but I was dissapointed in myself.  

I am finally feeling mostly better, and have completed my Daddy assignment which will get a seperate post.  But I am still pretty lethargic and my motivation is still pretty elusive. 

 
I need a kickstart to get back into my Day to Day.  Right now it’s getting away with bare minimum and that can’t go in much longer.

Any tips on how you get yourself kicked back into normal gear?

P.S. Thanks for witnessing my pity party.

Missin’ U Daddy

Daddy’s away at work right now. Huff!  Big me understands but ‘little’ me is missing her Daddy.  I can’t really complain.  I’ve been busy too with summer wind up and starting a new routine with my job.  Then again maybe that’s why I am feeling so lonesome.  Transitioning takes a lot out of this little girl and she gets all at odds with herself.  She could really use some playtime with Daddy.  This little one had been reminiscing a lot about her last ‘little’ day with Daddy.  No worries, no schedules, just playtime, coddling, cuddling…and maybe a few spanks.  I was truly able to shut my brain down and just be.  I have been able to wind down with my daily little time.  Colouring, and crafting and chatting with sparks.  That seems to be just a band aid right now.  Hopefully Daddy and me can connect soon but until then, Daddy know that I miss u bunches from my head to my toes!

  
My bottom misses you firm warm hand.

  
My nips miss your lips.  Your kisses and your pinches.

  
 And I couldn’t agree with the above more.

Kisses and cuddles Daddy!