So, I have a tendency to be impulsive. Not overly impulsive but I will see or hear of something like a certain activity and it strikes my interest so much that before I have even tried it I start promoting it like it’s the best thing since sliced bread. I sometimes tell others about it like I am a tried and true veteran and attempt to gain support for this activity that in reality I have never actually tried before. To be fair, on MOST occasions, when I finally get around to participating in the activity I enjoy it. I am even pretty good at it and all my bluster is justified. So no harm no foul.
Then…there are sometimes I shoot my mouth off on my blog, about the possibilities and therapeutic benefits of self administered spankings for those long stretches between Daddy visits. I saw some info on it, it struck my interest because I was pouty at Daddy being away so long with work, and immediately thought it would be a good idea to post about how this could be a great activity in a blog Daddy knows about and monitors. Daddy wrote to me the other day and told me he missed me and was thinking about me and that he was soooooo proud of me for maintaining my blog. That he thought that the self spanking thing was a very good idea and that it would be beneficial as a scheduled maintenance practice when Daddy is away on long hauls. He said he was compiling and putting together some training programs for me that will be done soon and that will be a part of it.
Yeah…so…never actually tried that whole self spanking and now it sounds like it is gonna be a fairly consistent occurrence for this little girl.
So this evening after work I mustered my courage and thought i would do a dry run of it before my new schedule is completed and Daddy exerts his dominance. I was nervous, a little excited and determined to prove this would be like so many other activities I have advocated for blindly to be enjoyable.
I bared my bottom and decided to apply a bit of icy hot to my cheeks to make up a bit for what I assumed would be less forceful impact (again with the jumping of the gun) then decided to give myself 50 with a wooden spatula Daddy made me buy specifically for spankings. Deciding to go with a 1-2 cha cha cha rhythm as it was easy to remember I started with a couple of awkward test strokes to get the force and angle (much harder then anticipated). When I was successful and surprised at the sting I could produce I put myself in the diaper position and began. I did not give myself enough credit for the amount of force I could create. The icy hot was completely unnecessary! By six strokes on one cheek, I was gasping and flinching and forcing myself to maintain force, I know Daddy won’t let me skimp if(and I mean if) this becomes a regular thing. There might be some negotiating/begging about this particular ‘new’ routine. A lot was embarrassment, the smacks seemed to ring out and echo of the walls and I was terrified my roommate could hear them (cringe, blush repeat x 1000)
I digress, by the 5thh swat on one cheek, I had to switch cheeks and my pattern seeking brain thought this was a good idea. Swat one cheek x5 and switch until I reach 50. The second cheek was a bit harder but I maintained force when I switched again the burn had set in and though I maintained force any thoughts of maintaining a rhythm were lost and I just gritted my teeth and willed myself not to drop the spatula. I finished but my ouchie bottom was burning and I sent myself to the corner to think about my impulsive behaviour, cause it definitely got me in the hot seat this time.
I will be fair and say Daddy had delivered much worse, but the self administering is very humbling and I think the emotions fluttering in my brain did a fair bit to amplify the pain. 1/2hr later my bottom is a little tender with the odd tender spot the humble feeling will prob outlast the colour in my bottom.